Female. Gay. England.
Writer. Photographer.
Too much Glee. Even more Naya Rivera. Santana. PezBerry.
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
What the Fuck ever brownies
1 splash of baking powder
Enough flour to make as much cake as you want
Last of a tin of coco powder
Find some almonds? Yeah chop them up and throw them in
Some sugar, about half of the amount of flour.Mix it in a bowl.
Melt that bit of butter you have left in the fridge. Pour it in.
Add eggs. Drop one on the cooker. Desperately try to scoop it up. Egg on hands. Despair. Add like 3 eggs.
Find a can of condensed milk in the cupboard. Add it slowly, stirring until thick batter is made.
Chop up a bar of chocolate. Chuck it in.
Find some super old mini marshmellows. Eat one. Still good, add them in.
Put some grease proof paper in to a tray. Attempt to fold it neatly. Fail.
Throw batter in. Realise pan is too big, pick up paper and float brownie batter to smaller tray.
Smear batter as flat as possible. Batter way to thick but too late now.
Pour some more condensed milk on top to try to counter batter thickness.
Put it in oven, set to about 160 oC because your oven incenerates all in it’s path.
Cook some pork underneath it because brownies are not dinner. Consider the possibility of pork brownies.
When it smells good take it out the oven and poke it with a chop stick. Not done, put it back and force self to wait.Take out when done, attempt to eat lava brownie. Fail. Slink away with proper food and wait for them to cool.
Eat 3, declare success. Smear nutella on top because top is ugly.
Take picture, post recipe to internet. Act smug.
Eat brownies.
this is literally the best recipe i have ever read in my life
There’s a kid here, a human kid!
Glee AU: Santana’s father has cancer and Santana works in a strip club to help pay his treatment. Later Rachel follows her and finds out.
(Source: l-sarfati)
You cannot pretend to read a good book. Your eyes will give you away. So will your breathing. A person entranced by a book simply forgets to breathe. The house can catch alight and a reader deep in a book will not look up until the wallpaper is in flames
Lloyd Jones, Mister Pip (via theperksofbeingaprocrastinator)
Drabble #13
She had done it before; so many times that she had grown to think of the stage as her natural environment. But now, staring out at the rows upon rows of audience members, Rachel could feel her heart hammering in chest so loudly that it threatened to drown out the unbearable question screaming itself hoarse in her head.
What if it happens again?
Singing was what she did, what she had always done. There had yet to be any occasion for which Rachel did not have a number prepared and she never turned down the opportunity to belt out any song at any given point. The shelves of sheet music filling her bookcases at home paid testament to her dedication, her passion and her talent but still…
What if it happens again?
That sound, the all-encompassing silence that had hung in the air as the notes spluttered and died on her lips when she should have been claiming her moment. Rachel had never really understood the idea of a deafening silence but standing on that stage had felt like a void nothing could touch. “I can’t do this.” Rachel breathed suddenly, her voice wavering through the air as her hand reached out to grasp the heavy curtain for fear of her legs giving way under the mounting pressure.
“Yes, you can.”
Snapping her head to the left Rachel was met with Santana’s calm yet determined smile. Rachel stayed quiet as she allowed her gaze to drift back to the audience, her grip on the curtain tightening she found herself wondering if there had been this many people last year. She didn’t remember this many.
“Rachel.” Santana said softly, her careful attempts to get the singer’s attention failing miserably she sighed. She had been watching the other girl ever since she had slipped away from the rest of the choir to as she put it, check out the competition. It didn’t take much for Santana to realise her friend was almost certainly assessing the audience rather than whatever choir was currently on stage. She had waited for a few minutes though, mostly for Finn to approach his girlfriend, but once it had become apparent that he was more focused on helping Puck with his tie she had taken her cue only to reach the other girl in time to hear her terrified doubts, “Rachel, listen to me.”
Rachel closed her eyes as she let her head drop.
“You can do this.” Santana tried again, a proud glint in her eyes as she stepped between Rachel and the audience. Reaching out Santana untangled Rachel’s hand from its grip on the curtain and linked their fingers together, “You are going to blow them away.”
She managed to lift her head this time, her downtrodden gaze meeting Santana’s as she allowed her friend to cradle their joined hands between their chests, “What if I choke?”
“You won’t.”
Rachel shook her head as she swallowed back her tears, “But what I if I do?”
Santana paused as she looked at her friend, she had never seen this side of Rachel before; the nervous, uncertain girl in front of her was like a shadow of the girl who had stood in the choir room week after week singing with more passion than Santana had ever seen, “One audition does not determine your life Rachel and it sure as hell does not determine who you are.”
“Who am I?” Rachel mumbled bitterly, tears springing to her eyes as she looked up at Santana, “I’m a failure I-”
“No, you are not a failure.” Santana growled as she fought to keep eye contact with the singer, “It sucks okay? It sucks that the bitch they sent from NYADA never got to hear what you can do. She never got to see the Rachel Berry that I see, that I’ve seen, for three years and you know what? It’s her loss and it’s NYADA’s loss.”
Rachel felt her breath catch in her throat; her reflex to reprimand Santana for calling Carmen a bitch lost somewhere as the space between Santana and her disappeared, their bodies gravitating together as Santana continued, her voice dropping to just above a whisper.
“I’ve spent years fighting with myself, trying to pretend I’m someone I’m not. I’ve watched the girl I love fall in love with someone else, I’ve been rejected and felt like nothing I could ever do was right. I’ve done a lot of things I’m not proud of and made a lot of mistakes. I’ve seen friends lose their homes, give up their children and fight every day for even a shred of respect from the world.” Pausing Santana didn’t even try to hide the way her eyes watered as she looked at her friend, “Through everything that’s been thrown at me, the only constant thing in my life has been you and the undeniable truth that you Rachel Berry, are a star. So I know that you can do this because it’s what you were born to do.”
“You believe in me that much?” Rachel exhaled, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.
Santana nodded, one hand reaching out to smooth down the waves of hair cascading down the other girl’s neck she offered her friend a smile as she lowered her eyes, “More than you’ll ever know.”
(Source: pezberet)
